Many of you may (or may not) have wondered where I have been these last few weeks...Probably thought I got lazy and gave up on the blog...But no! I am here. I have just been going through a bumpy last couple of weeks/month. We all go through it at some point or another...or maybe go through it a few times in our lives...where nothing seems to be working out... everything that can go wrong does...and you start to feel hopeless. I hear ya, but guess what... we all go through it, and we all get out of it.
I know I have been writing a lot about healthy eats and working out...but this past month I have been learning...and am continuing to learn about how health isn't just about working out and eating right...it is also about keeping your mind right.
Mental health, I 've been finding, is equally as important as all the rest. In order to get results we really want, we need to work with our body as a whole...mind and body. I am no yogi or meditator...but I strongly believe your mind needs to be in the right place in order for your body to really reach its fullest potential.
I am about to get a bit serious with you all, but only for this blog...then we can get back into the fun, light hearted stuff. So grab yourself a cup of coffee...or a glass of vino...this is going to be a long one.
2011 already has been a tough one for me. I have lost two family members (one of which was the love of my life- my Grandpa), a family pet, and have been going through other personal issues. Prior to all these deaths, I had found myself worrying a lot about silly things, that really, in the end , shouldn't matter. With the recent loss of my Grandfather, all things that stressed me out or made me upset suddenly disappeared. It is crazy how a loss of something or someone so important can really change your prospective on everything. I am now able to see much more clearly on what is truly important in life.
My Grandpa was a marine raider...some of the strongest and smartest of the marines. So in layman's terms, he was a bad ass. He not only was a career marine...but he took care of his family and had a heart of gold. This man couldn't speak a bad word about ANYONE ever... wow...that is something to really think about. He was also a fighter till the end. I remember the minute I landed in California to go see him (he was in hospice care), my mother called me and cried, "Hurry up, he is waiting for you." My mother kept telling him to not leave until I got there...My Grandpa and I were extremely close, so he knew I would be devastated if I didn't get a chance to say goodbye.
It seemed like the longest car ride of my life...hitting every red light...California traffic...and my father driving...STRESS . When my dad pulled up to his assisted living home, I didn't even let the car stop...I bolted out the door praying it wasn't too late. I ran into his room and my heart sank...
My strong, funny, amazing buddy was in his bed...eyes shut...rosary's in hand, with a breathing device over his mouth. So strange to see such a strong man so weak. I dreaded for this day. Just knelt down next to him, held his hand, and said "hey buddy, I am here! I love you so much, I am right here!" I kissed his forehead...and just kept talking to him. Within 20 minutes he was gone.
Literally fought to stay alive until I got there. Again, what a bad ass.
His funeral was unlike anything I had ever seen before. 8:30 AM mass, church packed... with people even standing on the sides. We had priests fighting over who wanted to do the service...so he had 3. We had three marines kneel before my mother and fold the American Flag infront of her and give my grandfather a rifle salute. At the reception, there was an open mic to speak about how funny and amazing this man was. This lasted over an hour. People just couldn't say enough good things about him. This is what has changed me.
I had been valuing the wrong things in life. I lose this wonderful man, and meet all of his wonderful friends, and it made me want to be a better person. Losing him also made me want to be a stronger person. He was a raider...he was one of the fittest, strongest and smartest groups of the marines...He went through more than we can imagine. Here I am using "allergies" as an excuse not to workout and he had to go through swamps in the middle of the night for miles upon miles with zero light. I have it pretty darn good, and have really no excuse to be complaining.
This is a really personal blog and my thoughts probably sound a bit scrambled. I am just pointing out how we really need to value those we love in our lives and learn from the wise people in our lives. Life is too short to be worried about the "he said she said" things, or not having enough to keep up with the Jone's...Life is about enjoying it and making a difference in people. Being positive.
Since my grandfather engraved strength and health into me...I refused to let myself skip out on workouts, even though I was so emotionally drained. The workouts are what got me through the sadness. I didn't allow myself to go over to that "darkside" some of us can get to when we are so sad and lost. I chose healthful things to keep my mind right. I allowed myself to talk about him and I kept up fitness and healthy eating styles.
My Grandpa was a marine raider...some of the strongest and smartest of the marines. So in layman's terms, he was a bad ass. He not only was a career marine...but he took care of his family and had a heart of gold. This man couldn't speak a bad word about ANYONE ever... wow...that is something to really think about. He was also a fighter till the end. I remember the minute I landed in California to go see him (he was in hospice care), my mother called me and cried, "Hurry up, he is waiting for you." My mother kept telling him to not leave until I got there...My Grandpa and I were extremely close, so he knew I would be devastated if I didn't get a chance to say goodbye.It seemed like the longest car ride of my life...hitting every red light...California traffic...and my father driving...STRESS . When my dad pulled up to his assisted living home, I didn't even let the car stop...I bolted out the door praying it wasn't too late. I ran into his room and my heart sank...
My strong, funny, amazing buddy was in his bed...eyes shut...rosary's in hand, with a breathing device over his mouth. So strange to see such a strong man so weak. I dreaded for this day. Just knelt down next to him, held his hand, and said "hey buddy, I am here! I love you so much, I am right here!" I kissed his forehead...and just kept talking to him. Within 20 minutes he was gone.
Literally fought to stay alive until I got there. Again, what a bad ass.
His funeral was unlike anything I had ever seen before. 8:30 AM mass, church packed... with people even standing on the sides. We had priests fighting over who wanted to do the service...so he had 3. We had three marines kneel before my mother and fold the American Flag infront of her and give my grandfather a rifle salute. At the reception, there was an open mic to speak about how funny and amazing this man was. This lasted over an hour. People just couldn't say enough good things about him. This is what has changed me.
I had been valuing the wrong things in life. I lose this wonderful man, and meet all of his wonderful friends, and it made me want to be a better person. Losing him also made me want to be a stronger person. He was a raider...he was one of the fittest, strongest and smartest groups of the marines...He went through more than we can imagine. Here I am using "allergies" as an excuse not to workout and he had to go through swamps in the middle of the night for miles upon miles with zero light. I have it pretty darn good, and have really no excuse to be complaining.
This is a really personal blog and my thoughts probably sound a bit scrambled. I am just pointing out how we really need to value those we love in our lives and learn from the wise people in our lives. Life is too short to be worried about the "he said she said" things, or not having enough to keep up with the Jone's...Life is about enjoying it and making a difference in people. Being positive.
Since my grandfather engraved strength and health into me...I refused to let myself skip out on workouts, even though I was so emotionally drained. The workouts are what got me through the sadness. I didn't allow myself to go over to that "darkside" some of us can get to when we are so sad and lost. I chose healthful things to keep my mind right. I allowed myself to talk about him and I kept up fitness and healthy eating styles.
Losing someone as amazing as my Grandpa is pretty tough. My heart aches every day, but it is just so strange how everything else that I thought was so horrible in my life...disappeared. Goes to show what we value in life. I am going to try to be as beautiful a person as he was and continue to live life with passion and positivity, just as he would expect of me.
